So Much Of Life Is Wasted – Waiting

Man Wearing Gray Blazer
Waiting for the right job. Waiting for the right weather. And, even just waiting for the ideal email or text reply.
Ever waited for something and in hindsight understood just how much time was wasted? I know I have and I also know the pain of not having the ability to recapture those lost minutes, weeks or even years – they were gone forever. However, it is not my intent to be morbid here but to indicate some creative, optimistic and even risky thoughts on what lies ahead, what’s real, what you can control and what can or will elude you no matter how hard you try or how long you wait.
To start with, there are 3 types of waiting – waiting for something to start, waiting for something to end, or waiting for something to improve, change or maybe even recover.
But irrespective of the waiting or what we might be waiting for the consequences are always the same – frustration, disappointment, sorrow, fear, and even anger and yes, even more, depending on the magnitude or significance of what we are waiting for.
Waiting for Mr. or Ms. right before you are in your seventies is not a smart move. Waiting for the right career position after bouncing from job to job for twenty years may get in the way of the perfect one showing up. Waiting years for a poor relationship to end or to the other person to finish it when you know it isn’t or was not supposed to be or was not a wise decision you previously made can create a whole lot of anxiety, resentment, and bitterness. Waiting for your kids to finally get the idea of responsibility? Waiting for your workers to eventually have some respect, motivation or devotion?
Waiting till you retire for the vacation of a lifetime? And then your spouse dies before you get to go.
Waiting for decades for a promotion, recognition or increase – well maybe it’s time for a change. Waiting to truly live and have fun till you win the lottery, well, you might want to re-think your life purpose. Waiting weeks or even months for the correct client or client to show up – well you might want to rethink your sales or marketing strategies.
Having said all the above I need to be clear that I am not against waiting – for the correct reasons, for the appropriate period of time or for the right, best or suitable outcomes.
Are there common emotions, attitudes or expectations that may lead to a waiting mindset? In my experience, I think there are ten significant ones; hope, fear, want, insecurity, self-esteem, ego needs, impatience, the need for control, dreams and or arrogance. I don’t have the time and I’m positive you don’t either for me to dig into each of these in detail so allow me to see if I can give you a few summary points to take into account if you have been guilty of unnecessary waiting,’re awaiting something today or will, notice I said will and not may, wait for something later on.
As I see it there are three common denominators in all of the above reasons, mindsets or rationales; 1) insecurity – or the need for acceptance, the need for acceptance, a mindset of unworthiness or conflict avoidance. 2) fear – or the willingness to face reality, uncertainty or unknowns at a frequent sense or reality-based way. 3) Ego – or an unhealthy definition of what you believe you deserve, you are worth, you are worthy of or you do not deserve.
In the long run, waiting in most scenarios is life wasted. The present lifespan average of Americans is 77.3 decades. So, regardless of your age whether you are wasting days, weeks, months or years, in the long run, will give you memories of regret, resentment, apathy and or disappointment.
Is it worthwhile? Was it worth it? For me, looking back, sometimes it was, and, typically, it was not, but that is me.
Here are some things to take into account if you’re a”waiter”.
-Create a list of possible gains and losses for whatever you’re waiting for. Then weigh them appropriately for both the short and long term.
-Talk with people you respect who have had similar experiences or have insight into what you are considering waiting for and ask them for advice. You don’t need to follow it, but it can help you make better decisions.
-Start a decision journal and start keeping tabs on every decision you have made and their outcomes or consequences and I am not referring here to where you decide to go to lunch or what color dress to buy.
-Meditate on all significant decisions and listen to your inner guidance system’s or soul’s suggestions or inclinations or whatever you want to call it.
-Keep a list of all major life decisions and their eventual outcomes – if and when they finished; like a business, career, relationship or job.
-Don’t make decisions or take actions while under stress or emotional unrest.
-Be willing to admit mistakes.
-Learn to learn from everything irrespective of the outcome whether negative or positive.
-Declare emotional endings before beginning new beginnings.
-Pray about it.
These should get you started and, on the way, to better results and less wasted time and lifestyle. I can only say in conclusion that I wish I had done many of those earlier in life.

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